The annual list of best work excuses is out. Win cash if yours is better, funnier, or just plain weirder.

The facts

This time each year, the jobs site Careerbuilder asks bosses about the most outrageous and unbelievable excuses for calling in sick to work.

Last year’s favorites included “Employee’s false teeth flew out the window while driving down the highway” and “Employee claimed a swarm of bees surrounded his vehicle and he couldn’t make it in.”

This year? Careerbuilder’s 2014 Top 10 delivers once again. Our faves…

  1. “Employee was sitting in the bathroom and her feet and legs fell asleep. When she stood up, she fell and broke her ankle.”
  2. “Employee had a ‘lucky night’ and didn’t know where he was.”
  3. “Employee got stuck in the blood pressure machine at the grocery store and couldn’t get out.”

 The contest

Have you ever delivered crazy work excuses with a straight face? We want to hear about it — and if it worked. (We’re always on the hunt for news we can use.) If you got fired, we want to know that, too. Careerbuilder says bosses fire exmploeyes only 18 percent of the time for “fake excuses.”

The rules

It’s simple: Just describe your excuse and if you got away with it, and we’ll share it with all of our readers. Post it on our Facebook page or in the comments below. The deadline to enter is 11:59 p.m. on Sunday, Nov. 9.

The prize

$50 Amazon gift card, delivered to you with no excuses.

Last week’s winner

We asked for your best advice to save on Halloween candy, and we loved Aaron’s thoughtful answer…

I know it won’t help this year since it’s over, but there’s always next year! I wait until as close as possible to Halloween, or, if I think it’ll last that long, I buy it WAY in advance and keep it in a cupboard that I hopefully doesn’t remember exists. But if you’re part of a wholesale store or club store (Costco, BJ’s, Sam’s Club), there are great deals there, or CVS and stores with loyalty programs have great deals with coupons or cash back on Halloween candy. And you’ll find things like pencils, erasers, school supplies, etc are super cheap as well, so sometimes I hand out an inedible + an edible so kids don’t get diabetes but still get a sweet treat and something they can use. Or, I buy little bags of chips so they don’t overdose on sugar.

PSA: though oftentimes the most frugal option is to make it yourself, this is not the case here. Parents won’t (for good reason) let their kids eat homemade treats; packaged is the only good option here. I just think of it as paying my tax for trick-or-treating as a kid.

That’s good candy karma, Aaron — and good cosmic karma because you’re getting a gift card. Enjoy!

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Meet the Author

Michael Koretzky

Michael Koretzky


Koretzky is a PFE-certified debt management professional and the editor of

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Article last modified on March 8, 2018 Published by, LLC . Mobile users may also access the AMP Version: Best Excuses For Calling In Sick To Work: Win $50 For Yours - AMP.