Admitted to college or asylum?

By The Numbers: Idiots

sex wearables

19 million

Millennials who are “willing to wear a technology device – such as Fitbit, Pebble Watch or similar fitness tracker – during sex,” according to a group called The Center for Generational Kinetics. If you need a watch to tell you if you’re doing it right, then you’re not.

bad gift

52 percent

Adults who “have experienced a negative reaction from their significant other after giving an unexpected or different holiday gift because the item they really wanted was not available, out of stock, or too expensive.”

The survey by a company called 1010data drilled down further: “Respondents most often cited receiving the silent treatment (20 percent) as a top reaction from loved ones, followed by complaints to friends or family (18 percent), making the disappointing gift a topic at a social gathering or party (11 percent), arguing (10 percent), and most severely, ending the relationship (1 percent).”

sexual satisfaction

38 percent

Adults who are “currently satisfied with their sex lives,” according to a massive sex survey of 3,000 Americans led by Pfizer, which makes Viagra. The other 62 percent are unhappy and frustrated. Reasons abound, but the most common is the easiest to cure: “Only 13 percent of those dissatisfied with their sex lives are honest with their partners about their concerns and needs.”

health insurance plan

7 percent

Employers who offer health insurance and “use objective quality information” to choose their plans. In other words, all the other employers in this country decide on which insurance to offer their employees based on the crappy marketing copy from the insurance companies — and never even look at friggin’ Yelp, according to a University of Chicago study.

Remember this next time you can’t find a doctor who’ll take your insurance.

social media admissions

3 percent

High school students who admit their social media profiles and posts “would hurt their chances” of getting admitted to college or at least a good one, according to Kaplan Test Prep. Are they fixing this? Not right now, they’re busy.

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